[ There was the potential of emotions in the air, and it was another reason for Red to keep looking away before, just to keep himself from being dragged into more than he already couldn't handle. He should've heard the footsteps coming, but it's the touch that lets Red know that Cilan's there, one that makes him flinch at his shoulders, but he doesn't pull away or reject him. Just breathe, and count.
He knows there's no way to give an answer through this mouth like this (and he wants to, because it matters)--and so there's a small hum for Cilan in his mind, a connection hurried to start and end, with a tone unsteady even when it was in their thoughts. ]
Alvin told me. He has to know.
[ All the reasons he stopped helping out at the restaurant when they needed it.
And Alvin had been so adamant about telling him, so why wouldn't he be the same with Silver? And how could've Alvin found out but from one of the two, him or Ludger. There was a lot that still stung about that day, and still continued to sting after Sosyne's raged, and some part of him dug out bitter reminder of the hate he had carried out against Alvin, the way the man couldn't have just listened to him--but he refuses to focus on it, to latch on and make the damage even worse. The edges of the carpet continued to be chewed on, albeit slowly than it could, and his breaths stayed harsh and shaky, his hand slipping up to cover his face.
But why did he have to be like this, his mind whispers to itself. Why was he this weak. ]
no subject
He knows there's no way to give an answer through this mouth like this (and he wants to, because it matters)--and so there's a small hum for Cilan in his mind, a connection hurried to start and end, with a tone unsteady even when it was in their thoughts. ]
Alvin told me. He has to know.
[ All the reasons he stopped helping out at the restaurant when they needed it.
And Alvin had been so adamant about telling him, so why wouldn't he be the same with Silver? And how could've Alvin found out but from one of the two, him or Ludger. There was a lot that still stung about that day, and still continued to sting after Sosyne's raged, and some part of him dug out bitter reminder of the hate he had carried out against Alvin, the way the man couldn't have just listened to him--but he refuses to focus on it, to latch on and make the damage even worse. The edges of the carpet continued to be chewed on, albeit slowly than it could, and his breaths stayed harsh and shaky, his hand slipping up to cover his face.
But why did he have to be like this, his mind whispers to itself. Why was he this weak. ]